Love and forgive everyone. Pretty hefty, huh? Yet this is the mantra of Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, and Gandhi. All of the enlightened masters have preached this fact. Let’s start by defining love. Love is allowing another person to be and do what they want without your interference, as long as their actions do not infringe on your, or others’, free will. So it is not human love, per se, nor romantic love. It is more “go over there and do your thing, I do not need to be a part of this.” So this is attainable, and when you figure this out, life is a whole lot easier, less painful, and becomes more joyful. Your life can begin to be about you and your choices, not someone else’s. Now you begin to regain control.
Forgiveness is not about tolerance, justifying, forgetting, or pretending. It is about understanding that the other person has certain lessons to accomplish. Some lessons involve teaching, some involve learning. If you understand and practice Love, forgiveness is second nature.
If my spiritual path is to teach you how to be independent, then my life path may be to try to control you. If I am a great teacher, I will control every aspect of you. As long as you allow it, you will be absolutely miserable. You will likely blame me, probably go to doctors to get medication so you can tolerate me, all the time becoming more miserable. One day you wake up, actually listen to God, and say, “This is nuts, I am letting him make me miserable.” Then you can choose to change.
Love yourself, develop self-confidence and regain control of your life. Then you “realize” some of your life dreams, things change, and life is good. You would not be there if it weren’t for the great teacher you had. So hating and resenting someone only holds you in the uncomfortable position, not them. The hate hurts, literally. Your body is not made for such negative emotions.